Zometa infusion 3 update

 I got my third (of four) Zometa infusions yesterday. I'm out of the habit of going to the infusion center, but it's nice to see everyone and I got the nurse who is the best at finding a vein so there wasn't any bruising afterwards. All of my bloodwork looks good (I had cut my calcium intake in half because I was tired of taking the huge calcium pills, and this risk paid off! Levels are good!) and the Zometa infusion only takes 15 minutes. I was probably only at the hospital for a couple of hours, which is a very nice change from chemo days (where I would be there for 3-5 hours, easily). 

My NP told me that my reaction to the first treatment (which was absolutely horrible with a ton of bone pain) was very rare, and that Aleve is good for bone pain (and so is Claritin, which I take for allergies anyway). This is good to know, and I took some when I got home just in case. So far I'm feeling good and she said that everything looked great and I'm where I need to be. 

I was a little tired yesterday, and I can feel some tiredness today and a little joint and bone pain but nothing that's keeping me from doing whatever I want to do. I went for a little bike ride, I haven't had to take a nap. 

There is always a moment when I am waiting for them to get blood for labs where I can't help thinking that I wish I didn't have to do any of this. I wish that none of this had ever happened. I wish I could go back to the life I had before I found out I had cancer. That feeling goes away, but I want to record that it does happen because when I'm farther out from treatments I forget. I will never get to go back to the life I had before. 

My life now is great! I am feeling good, I am so happy with the care I have received and continue to received, I'm so grateful that I have access to the healthcare that has gotten me to this point. And, and, and, it's just true that my life is different now. It's not even really worse. It's just different. And I very occasionally get sad about how things used to be, when I thought that I would live forever (even though I knew I wouldn't). That sadness doesn't last. But while I'm waiting for them to find the vein and take blood and see if I'm healthy enough to do the treatment that will make me feel bad but maybe help me in the long run, I can't pretend that it doesn't exist. 

Anyway tl;dr: Zometa infusion #3 is done and it went well and I'm feeling pretty good!